Plot: John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) is a lonely, eight year old boy with no friends. When he receives a teddy bear (Seth MacFarlane) for Christmas he makes a wish for his only friend to come to life. John wakes up the next morning with his wish granted. Ted becomes a huge celebrity during the late 80's but still remained faithful to his best pal John during the craze. Twenty years later the fame has worn off and both pals are headed nowhere in life. John must then decide whether he is going to grow up to keep his longtime girlfriend (Mila Kunis) or forever be the eight year old boy with no friends.
Seth MacFarlane is best known for his hit animated series Family Guy, a show I feel has long overstayed its welcome, but when it was in its prime, boy was it funny. MacFarlane has now made the jump from the small screen to the big screen with his first live action project and directorial debut film Ted.
Going into Ted I had a bad feeling about it, but then early, positive reviews came rolling in and I thought maybe a film about a foul mouthed, pot smoking teddy bear can make if a full hour and a half without beating the horse dead……I was wrong.
The problem with Ted is the same thing that has in my opinion plagued Family Guy, it gets old quick. I thought the first few seasons of Family Guy were hilarious; there wasn’t a show quite like it. But after it was brought back from cancellation, its formula was predictable and wore thin.
I haven’t been a fan of Mark Wahlberg’s attempts at the comedy genre, this one being no different. Wahlberg didn’t feel right for the part of John who is supposed to be a 35 year old guy with a dead end job as a rental car worker and is somehow dating the highly successful, gorgeous Lori played by Kunis. In reality Wahlberg is 41 and Kunis is 28 and the age difference shows on screen, making the relationship a stretch to the imagination. A James Franco type actor would have made for a much more believable character. Wahlberg came off more like Tom Hank’s character Josh Baskin from BIG then an actual adult who can’t get his life together. It was painful to watch.
The film was repetitious; John promises Lori he is ready to grow up, Lori gives John second chance, Ted talks John into coming over and getting high and they get into trouble, Lori gets mad but gives John second chance. That formula is repeated up until the third act. You can literally sit there and know exactly what is coming up next.
The only bright spot for me were the surprise cameos that are sprinkled throughout the film. Patrick Stewart is funny as the film’s narrator. Sam Jones, whose fame comes from playing Flash Gordon in the 80’s, makes a funny appearance as himself in the film. Tom Skerritt appears very quickly at the end with a hilarious line as well. The only cameo that didn’t work for me was Ryan Reynolds two brief scenes. He had no lines and it felt they threw him in for more of a shock factor.
Nothing about this film connected with me. It was good for a few chuckles but then fades out quickly. If you still find Family Guy funny after all these years, then you’ll probably like the film. It has all of MacFarlane’s go-to jokes throughout the film. There’s the random flash back sequences and an extremely too long fight sequence between John and Ted, both reminiscent of Family Guy. If you haven’t been a fan of Family Guy for a while, stay away, it’s that much like Family Guy.
Final Verdict: 4/10
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Loved this movie. It was definitely a laugh a minute from the constant one-liners that were sprinkled throughout the film. What made the plot so interesting was that Ted was accepted by society as a "regular member." That theme guiding the script writing was amazing. Not to mention the themes of forgiveness, true love, and undying friendship. Think about the messages of this well-acted film and enjoy the trials and tribulations of Ted.
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